need of break

I am sooo tired. Today, 16 hours work day. Tomorrow, sleep in big time! Right now I feel like a sleep walker, or a zombie. It's gonna get better in a minute, but man it was hard to get up this morning.

ze shiet

So, again, I've spent my evening watching Californication. Wouldn't chose many other ways to end this day. But tomorrow's 16 hours work day tells me it's time for bed. So sleep tight!

fucking thieving dentists

I tried to book an appointment with my dentist today. Or I did book one. It is time to get at least 25% less wise, because my tooth is not gonna be around for much longer. But I started to cry when she told me how much I could have to pay for it. I litterally cried. Stupid hormones. 

Anyways, tomorrow I'm gonna unbook my appointment, because my dear friend Emilie got upset with what they wanted me to pay for this minor action, that she dug up some info. So short said, I'm gong somewhere else. Fuckers... 

well well well

So today was something. Well, not really but anyways...

I worked, how unusual, and had not much to do, so I could spend time in the sun, reading and sleeping in the park. Then I had a super nice leg session at the gym.

My brother is home from the north again, but we're hanging out with eachother in different rooms, just like normal then.

I finally got to have a nice, but short, chat with my bf Steven. I'm looking forward to go home soon and hang out with him again!

And I'm dowing Californication. Any suggestion on series to watch. Oh, and True Blood had some nice sexy scenes this week.

family time

Tomorrow my brother is coming back from the North. We're gonna spend the evening together. Watching Spiderman, or was it Batman? Haha, I have no idea, but it's gonna be great!

am i or am i not?

I went to bed when the sun came up on the horizon. I haven't done that in a while! 

I'm sitter here trying to feel if I feel all the Skinny Bitches from last night. I'm not quite sure yet. But I'm sure that I have to pull out my tooth ASAP, this is not okay. I can hardly open my mouth.

Holy smokes!

Shit I just opened the front door to see how hot it was. I thought I entered another country to be honest. I'm going to the park pronto, this is not to be missed out on!

carpe diem fuckers.

I'm up way too early for being today. Just had one of those "shit I'm late for work"-wake ups. Took me a long minute to realize that I'm starting work at half three today.

I didn't reallt end up drunk last night, even though I was pounding that wine in the end. I think it was because of my big dinner juuuuust when I got there. Well I'm actually kind of glad. But I have a new chance to get smashed tonight as I'm going out with my second mum and some other family female members..

thank god for that

Heeyaa... Such a hectic day at work. I'm soooo glad that this it's over. I'm just gonna take a shower and then take my bag in box and get drunk. Aaah, sweet thought.

something something

Today ended up pretty good anyways.. 

Went to the palace and got shit done. 

I wrote some, sang some, played some. I enjoyed it so much.

I've been a sweet pig today too, so of course the gym session was a must.

I did not hit the town, but I've been watching some Californication and laughing. Home alone too, feels nice to have some peace and quiet.

Tomorrow I'm working and co-hosting my friends house warming party. I'm kind of looking forward to get smashed faced wasted tomorrow. Good thing I got payed today then. 

Time for bed. 

Sweet dreams.

dancing

Wow, my dance stamina is nowhere near what it was four years ago. I may be somewhat fit, but God, dancing takes the shit out of me now. And I've only practied for 15 min. So sweaty and I want to vomit.

lazy days...

Okay, I've been chilling for far to long today. I'm getting ready to go to the practice palace for a few hours, since the sun didn't wanna join me on my one day off... 

Then gym and then I'm hitting the town.

the other version

The "greater" version of me.
Maybe not ideal, but I'm still nice, deep deep inside.

work and visit

Work was reaaaaaally relaxed today... So I could spend time in the sun.

Just got a visit from my gran. I love her, she's amazing :)

a cuppa

Work offers eating water melon and drinking tea with a 98 year old, well.. maybe not the whole shift, but a nice ending of the evening.

Thing's you have to do: Sleep

I had a wonderful time with my dad and everyone else I would include in my family, without being blood related. Dinner at a over prized, not too tasty steak house. And then a pub round. I'm happy I restricted myself to two glasses of wine, tomorrow's double shift would not get any better with a hungover...

Now I need the next 6 hours to sleep. Period and good night.

Things you have to do: Eat

Time to get ready for dinner with my dad and my step mum and our friends. I'm looking forward to it, though I have to get to bed some what early since I have a 16 hour shift to kill tomorrow.

my job

Today I kind of realized what a job I have here. I mean, I already knew, or course. But the people you go home to... 

Today I went home to my favourite 98 year old. I spoil her, that's just how it is. 

I also went home to a psycho lady, I mean really psycho. And she's off the meds now too. 

I went home to a lady that told me that she had cancer. 

Then I went home to another psycho lady, that also told me she just got cancer. 

And a man that can't do anything but to be in bed. He get's his food and liquids through a tube into his stomache.

So yes... the job itself is quite easy. But to take care of sick, tired and old (sometimes quite young) people it not an easy job for the mind. I do it a few months of the year, and that's about what I can take. My co-workers do this all year around... Kudos to them. The thing is that you have to have a sence of humor and laugh inbetween the rounds. This kind of job would kill you otherwise.

world, hold on

Aaaaaah, the nice feeling of waking up at 6 am and feel rested. 11 pm last night I died for seven hours, that was some heavy heavy sleep.

PAMP the VAMP

Tonight I'm having a spoil "myself before going to bed"-night. 

Nights like these are amazing. The little things you can do for yourself....

save tonight

Tonight I played with the last hour of the sun.

summer house.

Okay. .. the trip to the summer house was relaxed to maximum. It was raining every day except the first and the last. Ironic... So I've been eating, reading, hanging and everything all over again. Plus some work in the garden, inbetween the rain showers.

I also entered the slightly cold, but oh so sweet ocean, everyday but one, dispite the weather. The feeling of freedom as the body got used to being under chilly water. The slight panic when the toes first touch the surface, the heart beating faster to keep the body warm... It has been one day and I already miss it.

It was really cool to see my family that lives down there. If i'm lucky I see them once a year. Not close to enough. Therefore I will go down and visit them before heading back to London in September.

The trip home was long and slightly boring, but I was dreaming away to the hours I spent on a bus in a far off country. But I like the time alone like that, when you have nothing but thoughts, and music. All you can do is recall, dream and plan.

home, bed.

I'm back home in Stockholm. I will tell you about the past week tomorrow, I have to go up in 5 hours to go to work. Gah!

yet another boring post.

Not much to say again. I met up with my friend Fabian after work today. That was really nice, and I love how we grew to become such good friends.

And I've cut my brother's hair. Nice and tidy. I'm so getting better, and faster.

Now I have to shower and I still have to pack because my mum and I are going down to our summer house tomorrow as soon as I am off work. It's getting late. The past few days I've been waking up at 5 am to practice, but then I would already been sleeping one hours ago. So maybe not tomorrow.


Peace, Love and Understanding!

wise words

You may not be her first, her last, or her only.
She loved before, she may love again.
But if she loves you now, what else matters?
She's not perfect- you aren't either,
and the two of you may never be perfect together
but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice,
and admit to being human and making mistakes,
hold on to her and give her the most you can.
She may not be thinking about you every second of the day,
but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break- her heart.
So don't hurt her, don't change her,
don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give.
Smile when she makes you happy,
let her know when she makes you mad,
and miss her when she's not there.

-Bob Marley

hello

Hello world. I'm back at home.

Slept in long time this morning, chilled with my dad and my second mum for a bit before my dad drove me to the bus station. Took me almost 2 hours to get home, or to the practice palace, where I met up with my gran that fixed a dress from my great gran, probably from the 50's.

Well, then the gym and now here. Chilling..

Five more days then I'm off to the summer house. That is gonna be GRAND!

feeling better

I ended up not going to the practice house, and went to bed at 10 pm instead. Of course I got the grades on a lady week, so yeah, my world fell apart. And now, at 6 am in the morning I feel so much better. Time to go to work, then as said, to my dad's.

going away

Tomorrow after work I'm heading out to my dad's to do some physical work in their progress of compleately redoing their house. And I will for sure have some sauna time in the evening, and some playtime with two slobby dogs. 

After this sad reaction from my grades I want to spend some time mentaly prepare myself for what is yet to come. God I sound so stupid, but it's true. 

Later... like Sunday or someting.

work harder, sleep less

Got my grades back today. I'm not too impressed to be honest. But what can I say? I have become so much better this year, and that is what should count. Me and "bad" grades has never been a big hit.

When I was a kid I cried when I got the score 41 of 40 in Geography because my friend got 42 and I should have know the name of that lake too.

So you know what that means... 

Well, if you though I was a geek before, wait until school starts again. Emily is putting back on the granny-panties. Period. And now I'm going over to my practice palace. I might consider moving some clothes over. Feels like I'm gonna spend a lot of time there from now on.

Such a Summer day!

So today was again, soooo hot and nice. And I had my day off and spent most of it with my friend Jeanette. We took our very first swim today, or three. It was amazing and I couldn't have spent the day any better.

Of course I went to the gym and now I'm gonna shower and take my stuff and probably go to my grans flat to practice some and then read. No internet, no one else. Just me. Sounds sweet.

strong discipline here....

It's such a nice day out but I'm heding for my practicing quarter to practice a few hours before work. I wanna be outside so bad!

call it a wrap

It's almost half ten and I feel that I have nothing to do up. So I might just take a shower and hit the bed. Oh well.. good night people. More interesting posts soon to come I hope.

keep em' comin'

Sorry for being bad at updating here.. Not much has happened more than I now go to work so that I eventually can get some money. It's nice to be back and it's such a nice job. I was suppose to be off today, but they called me in. I wen't food shopping for a lady, talking for a while with another and walking around with a third. Yes, it's payed.